chrismartucci

(Because I needed a hobby)

On rudeness

Posted June 16, 2015

As I get older, I am noticing more and more how rude some people can be. Whether it's in email, on the phone, driving, waiting in line. Someone mutters something under their breath, takes an exasperated tone in conversation, cuts you off, or worse. Of course, the remoteness of the internet intensifies the problem. It's not everyone, but the brain remembers the negative encounters more than the neutral ones, and active kindness is infrequent among strangers.

So I guess I have two things to say.

First, stop being rude to people. It's not cool. I notice some people proudly share their rudeness like they're comparing battle scars..."You should have been there, I asked to see the manager and I told him off, completely chewed his head off..." Good for you?

Absent repeated instances of intentional disrespect (and probably even in that case), being rude is never necessary. I somehow doubt this is the kind of situation people encounter daily, and yet people are rude every day. I think the reason is that we have a tendency to assign intent to what is probably 99% of the time a complete accident. People aren't out to get you, but if we're rude, we kind of make it so...which brings me to my next point.

Be nice. Stop taking minor things so seriously (and yes, most of the problems we encounter daily are minor, with obvious exceptions). And let it go.